Introduction: God’s calling His people into a new kind of community (Romans 12:1- 15:13). We’ve been called to this new kind of community because we have been justified (3:21-3:1), blessed with the gospel (5:1-11), spiritually united with Christ (6:1-23), living with the Spirit (8:1-39), chosen to renew the world (9:1-33), saved by Christ alone (10:1-21), and given hope (11:1-36). 

The first characteristic of this new kind of community is spiritual worship (Romans 12:1-8). The second characteristic is authentic love (12:9-21). What does authentic love look like? Authentic love is having unconditional love toward our Christian community (12:9-16) and overwhelming our enemies with goodness (12:17-21).

Christian Community: Authentic Love is Unconditional (12:9-16)

12:9: The word “genuine” (anypokcritos) means “without hypocrisy.” (Stott, 330) A person who acted in plays (and wore masks) was known as a hypokrites. Christians are called to take off our masks (be real) and love authentically! Love also includes hating (abhor) evil and holding onto that which is good.

12:10: The word translated “brotherly” (philadelphia) refers to the love between brothers and sisters and “affection” (philostorgos) highlights the love between relatives but more commonly for a parent’s love for his/her child. Thus, Paul wants our Christian community is be filled with the same kind of love that fills one’s own family. 

In addition, we are to “outdo one another” by treating one another with honor. Rather than being selfish and demanding others to respect and value us, Paul exhorts us to actively honor and “lift up” our Christian brothers and sisters (cf. Philippians 2:3-4). 

12:11: The key point in 12:11 is serving the Lord. Paul connects the idea of loving our Christian brothers and sisters with serving the Lord. We should not be lazy (slothful) in serving the Lord, but rather, we should be fervent (aglow means “to boil”), that is, be enthusiastic and passionate.  

  

12:12: In contrast to a “shallow kind of love,” authentic love is committed for the long and grueling journey. Authentic love places trust in hope (even when things don’t seem to be too good). It stands firm and perseveres (patient means to “remain under”) during testing (tribulation). Authentic love for our Christian community also leads to continuous (constant) prayer for them.

12:13: The early Church in Acts met the needs of their people (2:44-47; 3:1-10; 4:32-37; 5:16; 6:1-7; 11:27-30) and hospitality was important (Hebrews 13:2; 1 Peter 4:9; 2 John 10; 3 John 5-8) because the travelling inns were considered dangerous and many had bad reputations.  

Citing Adolf von Harnack’s “The Gospel of Love and Charity,” Pate lists ten ways that the early Christians met the needs of people via acts of charity including (1) alms, (2) support of teachers and officials, (3) support of widows and orphans, (4) support of the sick, the infirm, and the disabled, (5) care of prisoners and people languishing in the mines, (6) are of poor people needing burial, and the dead in general, (7) care of slaves, (8) care of those visited by great calamities, (9) furnishing work, and insisting upon work, and (10) care of brother and sisters on a journey (hospitality), and of churches in poverty or any peril.” (p. 252; cf. Galatians 6:6; Philippians 4:15; 1 Timothy 6:17-18)

12:14: While it’s generally true that it’s our enemies that persecute us (and perhaps this verse fits better in the next section about loving our enemies) we should also note that sometimes our Christian brothers and sisters are the ones that intentionally hurt us. 

Regardless of your interpretation, Paul’s challenges us to bless those who intentionally harm us (Jesus’ teaching: Matthew 5:44; Luke 6:28). This is a tough thing to do. This new kind of community of authentic love encourages us to ask God to give grace to the very person who’s wishing some judgment or punishment to fall upon us! 

Only a person who has experienced God’s grace, mercy, forgiveness, declaration of being righteous, union with Christ, life in the Spirit, and hope will be able to bless those who have cursed us. 

12:15: Authentic love is real and genuine love. We meet people where they are emotionally. If they are “up” then we rejoice with them (2 Corinthians 2:3). But if they’re “down,” then we weep with them (1 Corinthians 12:26). We need to come alongside our brothers and sisters to support, encourage, and bear their burdens (Galatians 6:2).  

12:16: All families have their disagreements. Likewise, our Christian family also has quarrels, dissensions, and fights. Authentic love for our Christian community includes pursuing “harmony [being of the same mind] with one another.” (cf. Philippians 2:1-2) 

A “haughty” (prideful) mindset will stop us from having the same mind (harmony). Pride seeks to get our own way. While the world labels some people “lowly,” Christians should be humble (don’t be wise in our own eyes) and honor the people before and above us. 

Enemies: Authentic Love is Goodness (12:17-21)

12:17: In contrast to the Old Testament teaching of an “eye for an eye” (Exodus 21:23-25; Leviticus 24:20; Deuteronomy 19:21), Jesus taught us to repay the person with generosity and goodness (Matthew 5:38-42; cf. 1 Peter 3:9). A person with honor is noble and respectful; he or she won’t return evil for evil. 

12:18: Paul encourages us to “live peaceably with all” our enemies with two caveats. First, we seek peace when it’s possible (there could be mitigating circumstances). Second, we seek peace in so far as it depends on us (the other party must want peace). In short, we can walk away with a clear conscience if we have strived to pursue peace (Matthew 5:23-24). 

12:19: Vengeance is the most natural response when our enemies hurt us (Genesis 27: Esau wanted revenge against Jacob when he received the blessing from their father). But God has called us to a new kind of spiritual community. 

We are called to authentically love our enemies with goodness and leave judgment and punishment “to the wrath of God” (Paul cites Deuteronomy 32:35 to encourage us to trust in God’s holiness, wisdom, and sovereign plan).    

12:20-21: These two verses provide the fitting conclusion to Paul’s call for us to love our enemies. We don’t win over our enemies through intimidation, hatred, or retaliation. Paul’s call (quoting Proverbs 25:21-22) is more than just not retaliating or pursuing non-violence (though this is good too!). 

God’s call to a new kind of community wants us to go a step further. We overcome our enemies with goodness. We overcome evil actions with goodness. What kind of authentic love are we talking about? We feed our enemies if they are hungry and provide drinks for our enemies if they are thirsty. 

Now, that’s radical love! That’s authentic love in action! 

Finally, the idea of heaping burning coals over a person’s head refers to bringing embarrassment, shame, or remorse to our enemies because our goodness makes a mockery of their harmful ways.    

 

1. Do you think there’s a relationship between God’s call for authentic love (12:9-21) and not conforming to the world and renewing our minds (12:1-2)? Explain. 

2. How does organizing this passage into two categories (loving our Christian community, loving our enemies) help you to understand and apply the idea of authentic love in these verses?

3. Which exhortations in 12:9-13 are the most challenging to obey? Explain. How will you love differently?

4. Which exhortations in 12:14-16 do you find most difficult to put into practice? Share. Identify one way to demonstrate authentic love toward your neighbor on a more regular basis.

5. To what extent do you have enemies? Paul identifies several ways to love our enemies (don’t take revenge, be honorable, live peacefully, meet needs, goodness). Which one(s) will help you deal with someone who dislikes, gossips, or attacks (physical, emotional) you?

6. Sometimes our pride, selfishness, bitterness, anger, or jealousy gets in the way of loving people. Which one(s) do you need to overcome in order to love authentically?

7. Choose authentic love this week. Show the love of Christ to this person in a practical way. Have someone keep you accountable. Share.